Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Excuse Me For A Moment

I just remembered that I wanted to talk about something that’s been bugging me recently. I want to admit that I have a Problem with skirts. And also dresses. Especially ones that are knee length or shorter and NOT worn with leggings or pants underneath. As a woman of a certain age one would think (erroneously) that I would be quite familiar with the wearing of such. After all, I always had to wear skirts in school as it was against the rules to wear pants in that bygone era. And I was totally up front and centre in the wearing of the micro-mini-skirt in the mid-1960’s. They were teensy-weensy and yet I managed to keep my knickers to myself! (At least most of the time. Heh.) However, somehow in the long intervening years I’ve lost my skirt wearing ability. How did this happen?

To wit, just the other day I was dressed in one of my mid-knee-length elastic-waist skirts with a collared T-shirt and a shorter over-layer that could be described as a pinafore. The proportions looked ok (to me anyway) and the colours coordinated nicely but I felt a little breezy somehow so I added some stretchy shorts underneath. And well that I did because whilst we were out walking it was very windy and my skirt kept hiking up annoyingly in front when the wind blew from that direction. Also I got heated from the brisk walk and would have suffered from the dreaded chub-rub without my shorts to prevent nasty chafing. How on earth do all the girls wear skirts comfortably? Is it just me? Or are they not quite as insouciant as they appear? I demand to know! What clue am I missing? Does everyone just sit around looking elegant all the time?

And then there are the maxi-skirts that are so popular right now. These are just as annoying, I swear! How does one go up a flight of stairs carrying things so that you haven’t got a hand free to hike up your skirts? How do you not constantly catch your heels in the hem? Inquiring minds want to know! Or maybe I’m not a Real Woman? Have I been turfed out of the club because I don’t wear makeup or dye my hair? Someone forgot to give me the memo.

The only skirts I can happily wear and most importantly function in come down somewhere between below the knee and the ankle. So delightfully 1980’s. So dowdy. Unless one is very very careful with proportion, fullness and shape. Sigh. And even then I still need to wear something underneath to prevent chafing when out walking. Any wonder why I mostly wear pants? Or at the very least leggings or tights underneath? My shapely calves and ankles are honestly some of my best features and they rarely ever see the light of day. So sad. I’m sure you can sense my frustration. I want to be all girly and wear cute sundresses too! Wahhhh!!!!

So, it is what it is. I must use subterfuge. OK. Nevermind. Rant over. On to new horizons. More soonest.

6 comments:

Lauren said...

Pantyhose? Underwear with longer legs? Or not go on brisk walks? Those are the only options I have ever come up with.

Louisa said...

Lovely to hear from you, Lauren!

Ewww...pantyhose! Don't think I've worn them since I was a teenager. Not walking is not an option either. So I'll vote for the longer-legged undies! I already have one pair but I need to make some more.

Heather said...

I think you have an elegant solution with the shorts. I think most women just suffer with the whole skirt thing - usually with the dreaded pantyhose. I do like heavier tights in the winter, and since I don't sun tan, I hesitate to bare my pasty white legs in the summer, so I go with light linen pants a lot of the time. Or just say, "To hell with it, no one is looking anyway." But then we can do that on the islands...

Anonymous said...

haven't worn skirts in years. every time I put one on (and I do have a couple) they just look/feel frumpy without high heels and after a broken don't want to go there.

Louisa said...

I don't mind the heavy tights or leggings, I just don't like the feel of pantyhose. And you are so lucky to live on Gabriola, Heather!

And I'm with you on the heels, Jean! Not good for the old feets.

pao said...

I love skirts and dresses. I just add pantaloons, bloomers, petit pants or tights. Then there's pants as in trousers, or capris as an option too. Whatever fits the bill - you know, looks and feels good.